One question I get asked the most is “when should I allow my kids smartphones?” There are some parents, however, that adamantly tell me that they would NEVER allow their kids smartphones. Flip phones for the win, for them. I’m here to tell you, that would be a mistake.
I always tell my kids that it is my job to teach them the skills they will need to be a successful adult. This conversation usually takes place when asked why they have to do their chores, or why they have to come with me to this boring thing, or really just about anything else they complain about. We give them chores to teach them how to work, and how to keep a clean house. We give them an allowance to teach them how to budget and how to save their money for things they want. So, my question to parents is how are you teaching your children to handle technology?
It drives me a little crazy when I see social media posts from parents claiming their children will only have access to a flip phone until they are 18! These types of parents can also be seen “bragging” about how their children will NEVER have a phone! Sheltering your children from technology will do more harm than good in the long run. I have a couple of reasons for this opinion.
Kids Won’t Learn Proper Use
Would you give your child a credit card when they turn 18 without ever having discussed and practiced using money properly? I’ve seen what that can do to a college student’s credit! You also shouldn’t just set your child out into the world with barely any knowledge of what they can do with a smartphone! You need to teach them and guide them on how to properly use the amazing things technology can do.
Kids these days are digital natives. They are growing up with way more access to the world of technology than we could ever dream! It is very different from the way we grew up. It can be difficult for us to understand their world. However, we shouldn’t sit back and cut them off from technology, just because it was good enough for how we grew up. Do you know what else was good enough when we were growing up? Not wearing seatbelts or using booster seats. Technology changed to make us safer. Now we can’t imagine backing out of the driveway without making sure everyone is wearing a seatbelt.
While your children are still young you can shape their views and habits on technology. You can set time limits, and monitor their devices so when they do make a mistake you can help correct them. Through monitoring and communication, you can teach your children how to get the most out of technology and help them avoid the pitfalls.
They May Lose Friends
As much as you may not like your kids on social media, it is quickly becoming the primary form of communication for most teens. They no longer text, they use messaging apps like Snapchat and WhatsApp. They also use the messaging capabilities inherent in other social apps like Facebook and Instagram. To disallow access to all of these applications you are essentially cutting off their communication with their friends. They won’t get invited places, and soon be left out completely. I’m not saying this will certainly happen, but I’ve seen it happen enough to know that it can.
Not allowing social apps limits a child’s social growth whether we like it or not. Yes, these applications can be dangerous. In allowing them the freedom to communicate with their friends, you WILL be checking up on them. Use messaging monitoring apps like Bark and time limiting apps like Boomerang to make sure your children are doing and saying things that are appropriate. When they are caught doing things they shouldn’t, the punishment should fit the crime. Take their device away for a set period of time, or block access to specific applications.
Cutting them off from technology completely will alienate them from the rest of their peers.
Click To Tweet
Educate Yourself on kids smartphones
If your child was diagnosed with a serious disease, you would be scouring the internet for information about it. You may not have understood the disease at first, through your research you are better prepared to take care of your child. I think the same thing needs to happen with technology. Unlimited access to technology can be very damaging to a child. There are so many things they need to watch out for. You need to educate yourself on the technology they use and the apps they love. As you learn more about how these things work, you will be better able to protect them. Even if technology “isn’t your thing”, it comes very naturally to your children. Protecting them and taking care of them means learning about technology as well. I promise, the more you learn the easier it will become!